Pokémon

Pokémon are animals that live in the wild lands of Kanto. Some have been tamed by trainers, and others run wild. Many video games, a TV series and several movies have been made about them.

Pokémon Red, Green and Blue
Pokémon Red, Green and Blue were released in 1987 for the NES. Each cartridge was hand-crafted by the creator of the games, Saturday Tacobell. He developed the games in his mum's garage when he was seventeen. The games took thirty years to be made, however most of that time was used by Tacobell waiting for the NES to be invented. The games were criticised heavily by the media due to the games being essentially about animals fighting each other. The Daily Mirror ran the headline "BAN THIS SICK FILTH" and Tacobell was thrown in jail for three days.

Glitches

 * The Old Geezer Glitch is a glitch in Pokémon Red, Green and Blue which, after talking to a drunk old man in Cerulululu City, causes the mysterious glitch Pokémon, Fuckup, to appear.
 * There is a way of accessing Dave's Secret Garden. You have to press up, up, left, left, right, right, down, down twenty-seven times while talking to Dave in Cerulululu City. He then leads you to his house, where he will show you his secret garden. It is the only place in the game where you can find Hashatta, the weed Pokémon.

Pokémon Yellow
Despite being imprisoned for his previous games, Saturday Tacobell released Pokémon Yellow in 1989 for the NES. By this time, people were more tolerant of a game that promoted animals fighting. This may be in part due to the merging of the WWF (World Wildlife Fund) and the WWF (World Wrestling Federation) the previous year. At the time, the game was a success, and Saturday Tacobell became a quadrillionaire.

Pokémon Mauve and Grey
Pokémon Mauve and Grey were released for the Gameboy in 1990. They were intended as counterpart games to the originals and not as replacements.

Pokémon Gold and Silver
Pokémon Gold and Silver were released for the SNES in 1992. It is notable for introducing a number of new features to the series, including a real-time clock, a day/night system and the ability to suck the player off. The latter feature is only available on the first batch of cartridges created. The feature was quickly removed within a week of release. As such, the rare first-edition cartridges sell for ridiculous money on eBay (up to 2 million of these).

New features

 * Real time clock
 * Day/Night system
 * In rare cases, your Pokémon can become infected with genital warts.
 * The game can now suck you off. (Removed in some versions of the game)

Glitches

 * There have been cases of people having their dicks torn off while using the 'suck-off' feature. This is due to a programming oversight where they forgot to set a speed cap on the feature.
 * The ultra-rare Pokémon Celibate can be found in Fedex Forest if the player is female and somehow using the 'suck-off' feature.

Pokémon Crystal
Pokémon Crystal was released in 1994 for the SNES.

Changes from Gold/Silver

 * The game no longer sucks the player off.
 * Goldencock City is now destroyed.
 * A new radio station has been added called 'Kinder Bueno's Password Game'.

Pokémon: The Seizure Adventures
Pokémon: The Seizure Adventures was the first series of Pokémon. It ran on SBC English in 1997. It was banned globally immediately after airing its first episode. The episode caused all of Sodor's children to be hospitalized after having seizures, even those not watching it at the time. The series revolved around Donald Donut, a trainer from Pallet Town who got his first Pokémon (Snorlax) from Professor Tree. Eleven episodes were created, but only one was shown on TV. The rest were released on a Laserdisc box set, but as no-one on Sodor has a Laserdisc player, they remain unseen.

Episode List

 * Let's Go, Snorlax! It's Seizure Time! - Donald Donut gets his first Pokémon, a Snorlax, from Professor Tree.
 * Aaah! Snorlax is dead! - Donald thinks his Snorlax might be dead, but it isn't.
 * Battle with Branson! Virgin City Gym! - Donald battles gym leader Branson at the Virgin City Gym.
 * Kid Stole My Bike! Cerulululu City! - Donald steals the Cerulululu City Gym Leader's bike.
 * Verquadrillion City! Battle with Sergeant Electricity! - Donald battles Sergeant Electricity.
 * Hello Eric! Celabonbon City Gym! - Donald battles Eric, the Celabonbon City Gym Leader.
 * A Little Soul! Battle with Koga Koga Koga 2000! - Donald encounters a rather eccentric gym leader.
 * Battle of the Century! Sabrina The Teenage Witch! - Donald battles Sabrina The Teenage Witch.
 * The Reigning Blaine! Dethroning! - Donald defeats Blaine and briefly takes over his gym.
 * Son Of A Bitch! It's Team Fuckit! - Donald realises who the gym leader of Viagra City really is.
 * T3H L33T F0UR!!!1!!1 EPIC L0LZ!!11! - Donald battles T3H L33T F0UR!

Pokémon: The Second Adventure
Pokémon: The Second Adventure was the second series of Pokémon. It ran on SBC English from 1998 to 2001. It ran for eight hundred episodes and was a raving success. It followed the adventures of Ash Ketchup, Misty Pisty and Brock With The Big Hat.

Brock's hat
Brock's hat is a tall top hat which seemingly never ends. The top of the hat is never shown in the series, but there are many fan theories surrounding what is on top of the hat. Some say it is a bird's nest, while others say the hat is actually a second penis that has grown in a really unusual shape.

Base Set
The Base Set of the Pokémon Trading Card Game consists of seven cards. The Caterpie in this set is the rarest card in the whole Pokémon Trading Card Game, and frequently fetches over 4 million of these at auction.

List of cards

 * 1/7 - Blastoids (Holographic)
 * 2/7 - Caterpie (Holographic)
 * 3/7 - Charitard (Holographic)
 * 4/7 - Penisaur (Holographic)
 * 5/7 - Balls (Trainer)
 * 6/7 - Potion (Trainer)
 * 7/7 - Everything Energy (Energy)

Jungle
The Jungle set was an expansion to the Base Set of Pokémon cards. It comprised of 455 cards.

List of cards

 * 147 Caterpies
 * 87 Weedles
 * 64 Oddishes
 * 58 Exeggutes
 * 45 Charmanders
 * 24 Squirtles
 * 19 Bulbasaurs
 * 6 Fuckups
 * Tig Ol' Bitties (Trainer)
 * Pokédoll (Trainer)
 * Misty (Trainer)
 * Brock (Trainer)
 * Everything Energy (Energy)